Julie Oh Julie #3 – Love x Logic

The title mean that this is the continue part of Julia previous story. In the last episode (ehem I mean the last previous post about her). She’s dating her colleague who 4 years younger than her. And just like the other happy couple, everything is really sweet at the beginning, just like a bubble gum, the more you chew it, the more it become tasteless. But at least, the sweet last for 4 months.

The Heart Broken Julie

He was assigned to Bali for 3 months, and the mystery was start there. Suddenly he became so cold towards her, no text message, no phone call. He’s vanished within the air, nowhere to be found. If then a text come from him, is only talking about works. Seeing her in worried, I even convince her that perhaps he’s busy with his work there (actually I suspect him fooling around with many girl there in Bali =..= I just don’t want to see her worried for him) And then after 1 month being ignored, Julie gather all her strength and text him…

“What happened to us?“,

and she got the reply which she never wish to get,

“… I’m out of my mind, actually I have a fiance who waiting for me at home… Sorry…“.

Wow at this point, when she told me, I was madly angry to the guy. I never like her dating him, I did suspect him for only fooling around with his youthfulness, but I let her date him because she seems really happy for it. But what the heck did he done? Fiance? HOW DARE YOU fooling around with my friend!!

She was so sad, and crying for days, her eyes swollen and she tried to hide it with eyeliner and eyeshadow. She keep remember her late hubby, that he never do this to her, that this is the 1s heartbroken she ever experienced. But even after what he did, she can’t hate him…

Love VS Logic

After 1 month break-up, he back to the office. They encounter so many awkward moment (let me tell you something, never date a colleague!! LOL). after 1 month staying at the office, he was assigned out of town again to a small village. And 2 weeks later, in the middle of night, Julie told me that something good happen to her and makes her sooooo happy…

This is where the big difference between love and logic. She totally blind in love with him, only 1 sentence can make her smiling like that. Did she forget how did she look like for 1 month with that scary eyeshadow. Love is really amazing!

The next two days after that conversation, we are having lunch together like always. I ask her if he did really call her after that night. And disappointingly she answered me, “nope, he didn’t”, that she doesn’t understand what’s happening. Wondering why did he call her suddenly and said that he missed her, but the next day, everything back to zero, he didn’t even text her.

She told me that she was talking to another friend who has an opposite feedback with me;

I do know that Love is beyond Logic, but I wish that if one day I ever fall in love with a guy, at least some logic (a little one)  should stay with me to prevent me doing anything stupid.

What happen to that guy?

I hate that guy, he pretends like nothing happen with zero sin he ever commit to my friend. He was chased out of a village by the head village and the villagers (the place where he was sent for work) because he’s messing with a girl in that village. I don’t know clearly about what he has done, but to be chased out like that, maybe something terrible -LOL

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Julie Oh Julie #2 : Way To Understand Women’s Feelings

Love is coming silently…
Unnoticed, without you even realize it…
Slowly but sure…
and she finally found a way to a new love…

Picture by Nikayla Elizabeth

 Julia was being left alone in this world by her hubby last May 18th. I still remember clearly in my head how she’s trembling painfully when I gave her a hug on the funeral. I’m glad that she can overcome this state less than a year. She’s a tough woman and She just 27 years old; too young to keep linger on sadness. Knowing that love coming its way, I told her not to shut her heart completely and open some space in her heart. I feel a bit sad when I realize how a dead person being forgotten so fast, feel bad to her hubby. But I know this is the best choice, the forsaken should keep living their life, and somehow I think maybe her late hubby would also think the same way.

She’s now dating with one of our colleagues, a guy 3 years younger than her. She’s a bit confuse, not confident, and too much worries. Well, this is how a woman thinks; sometimes it’s not simple, and kind of complicated. Men can take this as a lesson to try to understand a woman way of thinking; it started from a little insecure feeling, for example,

How she looks like when she’s walking with the guy, did she looks old for him.
What people would say when they know she’s dating a younger guy,
That she’s a widow,
How the guy family can accept a woman like her into his family,
etc.

So many other simple insecure thought that would lead them to a little fight. A little fight which will lead them to even a bigger fight. It’s normal for her to think that way, she think that she’s not good enough for him.

For time like this, instead of getting pissed on the woman’s complicated feelings, turn off the phone and go sleep (this is what he does =..=). The guy should just give her an answer which would make her feels secure and convince her that this is the right way.

Now I’m just hoping that guy can treasure her more than her late hubby.

If this is drama, this might be her season 2 😉

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Julie Oh Julie #1 : The Precious Thing is Time

What does “Fate”, “Destiny” or “Meant to be” together’s means?

Suddenly I wondering what does “fated”, “destined” or “meant to be” together means.

Sometimes,
when we have a relationship then break up,
we said that…

“we are not meant to be”.

Then when we are separated for along time,
and meet again in such a circumstances,
we said that…

“It’s destiny”.

And many couple feel more secure after they throw a wedding party,
such as

“Finally I found the person, my red string, love of my life, my fate”.

But today I realize, that there’s no such a thing. Because after married, it doesn’t mean you’re with the person who fated with you, no guarantee at all. We are just guessing. Hoping that the person you’re married is the right person.

1st Case :
When they divorce,
once again they said…

“We are not meant to be”,
“He’s not the person” and such as.

2nd Case :
Or another possibility is,
when one of them died…
What do the other would said?

“Oh, they’re not meant to be”, or
“This is fate”

That’s why I’m wondering now.
For case 1, yeah maybe they’re not meant to be, fate being cruel and twist the way, but
how about the 2nd Case?
Does it mean that “You have 2 red string on your pinky?“, the forsaken should live on, right?

I realize that the important thing is not the person, but “Time” and “Feeling”.
Time sometimes long as you want to fast forwarded it, but sometimes it’s quick as a blink of eyes that you want to slow it or even backwards it.
Once I ever heard this phrase:

“You never realize something is very important to you until it’s gone”

And all that remains are the memories, created by time when you spend your day with the person. That’s why as long as your time is ticking, it would be great if you precious all things around you. We never know that time will twist us just with a blink of eyes.

Story of a friend of mine.

She having a relationship for 5 years, and married with a man, 5 years relationship we can call it destiny, because they even separated for around one year, and fate reunite them, finally they’re married. If it’s a drama, maybe the story will ended here.

Now they are a 1 year happily married couple without kid, have just buying a new house, and Monday May 16th 2011, they’re doing renovation for their new home. On Tuesday May 17th 2011 4 AM, while sleeping, the husband got a heart attack, and minor stroke, he was screaming painfully and being taken to the hospital by his wife. Even Doctor didn’t say any positive things to encourage my friend (his wife). And the next day, Wednesday May 18th 2011 around 9 AM I got the news that he died on hospital.
I can’t imagine how sad she is now.
All of sudden, just a blink of eyes. From a happily married couple into a widow.

As a friend, I don’t know what to say, when I come to her hubby funeral, I really can’t do anything, what should I say to make her feel better?
I always have this kind of thought, that encourage word sometimes makes her more sad. Such as “be strong“, “don’t cry God has settle this“, and another blah blah. It will make her cries more, because of being pitiful.
But some of them said that that encourage word is really encourage the forsaken people, I just can hug her and said “be strong, you can overcome this“, and when I hug her, I can feel it, she was shaken and cry harder…

My dear friend lost her hubby, all I can do only hug her, and say “be strong”,
I can’t even rub her tears, because I think, she better crying out loud.
I can’t even tell her to eat, because I know she don’t have appetite,
So I just standing there, watching her crying, silently…

God must be bored, that’s why God twist her life like this. Just with a blink of eyes, God turn her from a 1 year happily married couple into a widow. Everybody said “maybe this is the better way“, where I can’t find any better from this situation.

Tonight too, she probably can’t sleep at all.
Maybe the memories that remains keep replay in her head, the precious memories …

I hope she can overcome this and be strong, because life must move on. Especially for the forsaken people.

Time can heal the wounds even it left some scars.

I can say such a phrase now.
I don’t even know if I can do as what I said just know, when the circumstances lead me to this kind of situation.
That’s why I write this down, maybe someday if I lose my mind, I can read this and get my mind back. Afraid that I will be weak, so when I’m weaken “Oh, I ever write this wise post” lol.

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