Archive for October 20th, 2011

Nobody’s Perfect

I know nobody’s perfect.

I’m such an idealist person, the world in my eyes can be so perfect, and so the human who live within it. I know that’s no good. But yeah I’m still hoping something like that, but in fact, everything just gone disappoint me in the end.

If you met a guy, and had a crush on him, then you definitely fall for his appearance, because you haven’t know his personality. So it’s about you had a crush on him and you want to know more about him.

I have a guy that I had crush on for a very long time. I will admit it that his appearance is my ideal type. I even wrote it on my blog, Wish to the God, so that Guy could be mine. Then the very kind hearted God grant my wish. God gave us a string.

But appearance is not everything.

We get close, but the more I know him, the more I doubt my self.
How come in the earth, he got the most I hate personalities in this world?
I keep asking myself, do I really like him in the first place?

I’m the one who had a crush on him first, if I truly love him, then I can accept all of his personalities, all of his bad habit. I’m still trying to. That here in this world, there’s no such a perfect guy I ever dreamed. That it’s all just my naïve way of thinking.

I hate every guy who likes a woman over her beauty.
(It’s not “hate” actually, just “dislikes”.) 😐

But my mom said,

“Every guy in this world likes beautiful woman.”

Even my mom said that, even my mom discouraged me, disappointed me…

If a guy likes me because my beauty or my slim body, I’m afraid, afraid that one day if my beauty is fading away, and my body becomes fat, then he would left me to another beautiful sexier woman. Just like Ondine’s Curse Story.


Ondine’s Curse

Ondine was a nymph, a water goddess. She was very beautiful and, like all nymphs, immortal. However, should she fall in love with a mortal man and bear his child, she will begin to age like a mortal woman,

Nonetheless, when Ondine saw the knight, Sir Lawrence, she was fall in love and began to watch for him on his daily walks. When the knight noticed her, he was taken by her incredible beauty and came back frequently to try to get a glimpse of her again.

Eventually they talked and fell in love. He broke his engagement with the young noblewoman Berta and, in time, convinced Ondine to marry him. When they exchanged their wedding oaths, he vowed that “My every waking breath shall be my pledge of love and faithfulness to you.”

But it was not to be.

The following year Ondine gave birth to their son. From that moment on, her beauty began to fade, her body suddenly susceptible to the effects of age. As her youthful attractiveness gave way to a more mature beauty, the knight’s eye began to wander to the younger women he met at court.

One fateful day Ondine was out walking on their estate when she heard the sound of  her husband familiar snoring. Planning to take him back home so he could finish his nap, the amused Ondine entered the stables to wake him.

The scene she encountered filled her with great sorrow. Discarded garments littered the floor and her beloved husband lay sleeping in the haystack, his arms wrapped around his former fianceé Berta. Having sacrificed her immortality for this man, she was filled with anger and regret.

Kicking her sleeping husband, she woke him and uttered her curse. “You pledged faithfulness to me with your every waking breath and I accepted that pledge. So be it. For as long as you are awake, you shall breathe. But should you ever fall into sleep, that breath will desert you.”

Ondine still retained some of her magic . . . enough to make the curse come true. And so it was. Her husband would never sleep again.

I don’t want to curse the guy I love like this… 😦


Can’t they think this way?

That if you got a wife, who becomes more beautiful each day, then it’s a jackpot, it’s a bonus! But if you got a wife who her beauty faded or gain more fat each day then it’s okay, because you love her not because she’s beautiful, you love her because the way she is, as a person.

This kind of think that makes me afraid to take one step forward, I’m stuck on my last step.

I know not every guy in this world are likely Ondine’s Hubby...
Envy Them

Whenever I walking on the street, and seeing a couple, with the woman so fat, or ugly duckling, but they still have someone who love her walking beside her, I’m so touched, isn’t it wonderful? They are lucky to have that kind of guy beside them isn’t it? I envy them.

And I’m asking myself,

Will he still love me if I turn to be fat and ugly?

*sighing* 😦

I’m just want to have a guy, who will think that I’m beautiful even I’m not beautiful, is that too much?

Do all women in this world having this kind of thought?

Sorry for jumping into this post 😦

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